Monday, February 08, 2010

Who Dat?

In the fucking Super Bowl madness I think people forgot what the hospital is for. Sitting in triagony, dealing with these dumb motherfuckers I am about done. You know the night is gonna be rough when the first cup of coffee gets dropped on the floor, when there are patients swinging from the ceiling, when the other triage nurses are old as Methuselah and slower than molasses on a fucking cold ass day and (oh yeah!) theres a 29 year old OD on MOTHERFUCKING ECMO in the code room. Seriously guys, I think its time to re-evaluate this diversion is for sissies thing.

Yes, I'm a little bitter. People have been weirdos tonight. My drunk white lady who yells the N-word, yup, she's back. Mousy-looking drunk/psych/cancer hx Dee-da-Dee asshole that fell on the ice at BW3 and refused EMS before peeing on the sidewalk... he's here. He walked out of my triage room to go pee.. again. They are fighting in the adult homes, falling on the ice (come on guys, its been there for a week), getting bitten by every animal imaginable and vomiking on my floor. This shit truly needs to stop.  There was even a drunk girl who fell/was assaulted and knocked an eyeball out. She then proceeded to argue with the EMS crew that she was going to get up and leave. To their credit they handled her much better than I would have. I would have given her a cup, said "use this to bring your eye back when the fucker falls out for real" and let her ass walk. As my mom would say... dedicated healthcare professionals at work!!!

The highlight was one of the old nurses (who must me outside her head or off her meds) telling me that it is inappropriate for me to have my cell phone in triage. I'm not talking on it, its out of sight whenever there is a patient in the room, and I have triaged greater than 1/3 of the total patients in the department in the last 6 hours. Yes, I counted. If I feel like texting a friend, my family, or the man in the fucking moon its really none of her business.

So maybe I am a bitter triage nurse tonight. Thats fine. I don't have to be Miss MerryfuckingSunshine 24/7. The people that deserve it get the sweetheart. The rest of you fuckers better watch out!


Anonymous Ready2Graduate said...

I worked in the ER tonight in Louisiana. It was crazy. As soon as the game was over the place positively went to the freaking dogs! We were hit hard and fast. I think the only reason that it wasn't horrible all night was b/c the Saints were playing in the SB. Oh well, we have Mardi Gras to look forward to next week. Im sure that will be a great party in the ER. Sorry about your crazy night in Triagony.

2:15 AM  

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