Friday, March 26, 2010

Spider Monkeys

About a year ago I celebrated "Beat the Fuck Out of Your Nurse Day." AKA the day the chick that hit me got off in court. Yesterday I celebrated "Don't Kick Your Fucking Doctor Day." Christmas night some drunk asshole in police custody managed to donkey-kick one of the residents. He got the rest of his lockup eval facedown on the floor. So his day in court arrived. I went with the doc so she wouldn't have to go alone. Going to court sucks enough without having to be on your own. This little bastard was 1) still in custody and had been since Christmas (insert Eliot in the Morning insane laugh here) and 2) had the balls to plead not guilty. After a few tense words and some priceless advice form his court appointed lawyer, he changed his tune. He got 12 months with 6 suspended. So 6 months in jail. Not bad... not great, but better than a walk.

Things have settled down a bit in the aftermath of last weekend. People are holding it together and life goes on. The moon must be coming to full soon, because the freaks are out and about. Last night some lady told me that the spider monkey in her purse kept telling her to kill her sister. My first thought was to check her purse and make sure there wasn't actually a monkey in there. Yes, we have had monkeys in the department before. No monkey, psych consult, haldol.

I also received a pretty fucked up call from communications the other morning. One of the psych adult homes was sending a patient to us. She was pregnant (not sure how far along), and delivered in her room with her roommate. They cut the cord, tied it around the baby's neck and then dressed the baby in adult clothes. The staff didn't find out until 3 hours later. The baby was (obviously) dead and mom was schizophrenic and had no idea what the hell she had done.


Blogger battynurse said...

That last little bit just sort of leaves me speechless and wanting to cry. How horrible.
Mental illness is so sad. I feel for those who deal with it and their families who have to also live with it's many affects.
Glad the person who kicked the doctor didn't get off. But the one that hit you did?? That's just not right.

12:22 PM  

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