Saturday, October 07, 2006

The Cherry

OK, I know its not 530am as the ghetto computer is trying to tell me. I think its somewhere near 4. I swear I think this thing has a pull start back behind it. I just have to figure out which cord it is......

So am done working like a dog this week and DONE with ICU orientation! I still have to have a "resource person" to make sure that I am not overwhelmed and that my shit is getting done, but thats better than being babysat.

Had a chick that I admitted last Saturday from 'the vatican' (local catholic hospital) with a head bleed from an aneurysm. She was nutty that night and we attributed it to the blood in her head. Surgery 2 days later did not improve things. She talked non-stop about anything and everything. I'm sure her family thought it was cute, but for almost 5 days the bitch didn't sleep! One the 4th she told me she knew she was hallucinating... there were monkeys and little men walking outside of her room in the dryer. Ummmm...ok, so who's the president? Whats the date? Where are we? She knew all the answers. I started going in the room and saying...'Hey, tell me some stuff" and she would rattle it all off to me.

Last night she was definately about done with the no sleep thing and was punchy. As I re-started her IV for the millionth time, she started telling me about her sex life with her husband. This lady is 64 and a grandmother. I have talked to her husband almost every night and met the kids and grandkids. She told me "my cherry is pushed so far back I could use it as a tail-light."

I almost died.

So I'm going to the fancy wedding in Williamsburg tomorrow. Sweet couple, should be nice. His cousin is the football coach at the cops alma mater, so I see we will have a new friend tomorrow night. Got my lazy ass up this afternoon just in tme to make it to the mall and get a wedding gift and a dress to wear. You know the dress rocks when the well dressed gay boy at the shoe store raves about it. He had more fun picking out matching shoes than I did.

I will try to stay on top of this thing a little more. I think that as the fall wears on I will have more time off and not be so stressed. The wedding is still coming along nicely. I booked my moms airline tickets this week. (she is even worse on the computer than I am) But unbenownst to her, I have arranged for her best friend to come along too..... so I booked them both on the fights this week. Not sure when we get to tell her, but it will be a great surprise!Next stop... where to stay. Gonna be in Key West, have been there a few times and have my leads. Anyone out there in blog land have any suggestions????

PS Now the spell check on this fucker isn't working. I'm gonna post with type-o's rather than lose my shit again. Sorry 'bout the spelling!

2 Comments:

Blogger CharterJames said...

You really do crack me up.

By the way, I worked as a computer programmer for 15 years and I can't get computers to work either. Hate the things. And you know the old CW on kids, you never hear from them unless they need money. Well I never hear from mine 'less he needs computer assistance.

BTW, I hope it's okay with you. I sometimes read excerpts from your posts in the PIRP ( Defensive Driving) courses I teach.

2:51 PM  
Blogger jeepgirl said...

That doesn't bother me at all.... but I think it scared the shit out of the cop.

7:42 AM  

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