Saturday, July 23, 2011

Window Licking Good

First and foremost, I'm a little pissed right now. I worked nights, am on the way home and the major-ish roadway that turns into the minor-ish road that I live off if is a parking lot. Cars bumper to bumper. Its 97 degrees, the top is off, I'm in scrubs and I can see my damn turn. WTF?!? Then it gets better. I find out that there is no accident, no life-threatening emergency that has shut down traffic in order to land a helicopter.... the fucking mega-church down the road from me is giving away free gas. Every ghetto rat and trash in the area has clogged my egress from work and is on their way to MY turn, MY road, behind MY Kroger for free gas. Fucking ridiculous.

In other brilliant news the ER renovation is in full swing. Triagony has been moved to a completely new building so the "hole" has been replaced by the "back 40." It is quite a hike to the treatment area. It is even longer when you have an out of control psych patient, sick patient or any combination of not-so-good that walks in. On the upside, the triage rooms are BIG, have their own sinks, there is a room for EKGs and the screamer desk now has bullet resistant glass. The whole area is completely locked so you can't just get in. Much MUCH more secure than before. They have even upped our police presence which has been a noticeable and welcome change. (with the exception of puny girl who is only doing the university police thing because of daddy's connections. She has yet to impress me and is currently being investigated for NOT acting when the 21 year old the other day went off and she walked away).  The bullet resistant glass even has those microphones like at banks so I don't even have to SMELL the patients when they come in. BONUS!

The windows do get pretty raunchy though. People are always touching and knocking on them. I had a drunk girl use it to blot her lip gloss and many many people sneeze and cough on it. (No vomit yet). I once had a drunk psych patient lick the window. I wonder if he could taste the Berry Craze Lip Smacker?

One of the other upsides to nights is breakfast. Greasy spoon diner that has an early liquor license, great food and will let us in and serve us as soon as we show up. Normal opening times doesn't apply to the ER staff! So had a nice wind-down breakfast with a cute boy and then headed home to get my sleep on before 12 hours in charge.

Friday, July 22, 2011

One more

... for the cheap seats....

I told a first year dumb-ass resident to go to hell in the middle of the nurses station. He had it coming. My attending laughed so hard he choked on his drink. One of my prouder moments. :)

July Effect

I have never been this long without posting... ever. I half expected this thing to be gone when I got back. Drama on the home front has kept me away. Work is what it always has been. Will give the highlights sometime. I am going to continue to try to keep this a little more up to date. I think I need the time to clear my thoughts and bring myself back to center again.

For the record: Last shift 2 of our Police officers were spit on by a psych patient. (who had the courtesy to yell "I have Hep C" just before he did it). I had 2 city medics forcibly restrain some son of a bitch who said he was going to bash my skull in. (said SOB is a frequent flier from the bus station who was being seen for "malaria and bee sting") and another adorable 21 year old came in naked, strapped down and under arrest for spitting in the EMS provider's face. Let it also be said that he only had 1 brownie from that strange dude which probably contained the 'shrooms, exstacy and booze that caused him to act like that. He was a little more subdued when the magistrate walked in and then he walked out in police custody.

I also had the surgery intern tell me that my attending couldn't put the chest tube in a lung cancer patient with a tension until her chief got down. To which my attending told her to "get out of my department." God I love an attending with balls that isn't afraid to use them in July. Yes, it is july. There is even an article on the wall of our breakroom that outlines the "July Effect."

July Effect

I think that about covers it.